Knock  it off. For the love of all that makes life living, please stop trying to guilt trip everyone around you with your halo and doe-eyed goodness. If you do things out of the kindness of your heart, your reward should be organic. But if you do good things because you’re looking for some kind of reward or karma kickback, then you tarnished your good deed. If you constantly remind the recipient of your goodwill, then you get the guilt induced gratitude which is not gratitude at all. If you begrudgingly do something so your family, friends, and strangers can give you an attaboy/attagirl, then you’re only hurting yourself. In this realm called reality, organic good deeds with genuine intentions will be appreciated while contrived good deeds born out of a sense of martyrdom will be resented.

Some would say women do this more than men, but that is not true.  Both genders have their way of priming the martyrdom pump to guilt others into feeling less.  I know someone who can reel off a laundry list of all they done for everyone around them, and sadly because this list gets brought out from time to time, the recipients of the good deeds can never measure up. The person wraps their martyrdom around their shoulders like a sad super hero cape. 

So if you’re a closet martyr and you get some satisfaction in making everyone feel indebted to your goodness, then please knock it off. For those of us on the other side of that coin, we  resent you.


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